9:39am
WHAT HAVE I DONE? I am not ready Lord. Please, let this be untrue, for Andy's sake. for mine. for my families. Please what have we done? I cant be pregnant. I cant. Please. Take it away. I wont Lord. But please?
Your will Father. Only your will.
11:55pm
Broken. Thats all I am. I am a mess. A headcase. Why are they letting me roam the streets? I am crazed.
God.
Abba.
My Heart is broken.
1:33am Thank you Lord I needed that conversation. Not quite what I wanted to hear. but I needed it. Avoided- its how I feel. um Thanks because I need you.
NO I dont . I need God.
1:59 am
7 Hours of sleep may not be enough at all. My tired mind is so weary. I sleep on my tummy. This is a problem. I should learn to count the stars to teach me to lay on my back.
I will be a good mommy. Will I? I want to be- just not yet. I didnt want this. Not yet.
Thank you for sharing. Hard, I am sure. But a powerful story. Real. Excited to continue reading. God will use you and your story in BIG ways. Hope all is well with you and your sweet family.
ReplyDeleteAshley
I know those thoughts all too well. You are an AMAZING mommy! :)
ReplyDelete